It happened to me while I was rummaging through my desk drawer looking for my weekly pill container - one of those plastic things with a separate sealed cube for each day's worth of pills. I stumble across the flotsam from past lives: a transcript from NYU Graduate Film School (entered Fall 1979). It is a musty xerox. Grades for film production, directing, acting. I was 27 years old when I went there. I remember being embarrassed to let anyone know how old I was since just about everyone else had just emerged from college and it had taken me until my 27th birthday to get out of college. It is now 27 years later.
Other bits from the past surface. Here's a business card from the software company I started: Tigercub Software, Inc: Delivering Lotus Notes to All PCs in Your Company. You don't even know what Lotus Notes is - and if you do - probably hate it.
That was my slogan. I remember sitting with my partners in the Indian restaurant telling them how I had come up with the name: Tigercub. It was based on an old saying: If you want tiger cubs, you need to go into the tiger's cave. Similar to the New York lotto slogan: you need to be in it to win it.
That was another two years of mostly wasted energy. (Though I put up my first web site for Tigercub so you might think of this site as a tiger cub - now grown up.)
Here's the small album with pictures of the old girlfriend. She must be retired to Florida by now.
Here are all the empty pill bottles from years with the chronic disease. With memos about doctor's appointments. With keys from an old car. Keys from the old summer house - long gone.
You're only as old as you feel.
My nose is running and my back is sprained. I'll be sixty in 6 years. These are facts, my friend. You can't argue with facts. If all goes as it is supposed to you get about 7 decades in this country. So much of it wasted.
Those first two decades are almost entirely a waste. You don't control your own destiny. Everything is about the future. They're gonna make sure you feel guilty about something or other and try and get you ready for the rest of your life. Be careful because you may find that the so-called rest of your life that you've been preparing for doesn't arrive. You're always preparing for the next decade.
I'm supposed to be preparing now for the last two decades, 6 and 7. Screw that. That's about all I've learned. What am I going to do - retire at 62.5? Retire from what? I'm already retired, I just don't have the retirement program to prove it.
Well, the cat jumped up and is sitting on my lap purring away, so I guess this confession must come to an end. Besides, there's still more flotsam to wade through.
At least I'm not alone. This has got to be the largest aging population in American history right now. Remember how old "64" sounded, when you heard the Beatles sing, "When I'm 64?" I remember learning that song on the guitar. How quaint it all sounded. Now it sounds damned close.
3/06/2006
3/05/2006
Photography Lessons
I continue to get requests to do some lessons. So thinking out loud - here's what I've come up with:
BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPY LESSONS
$100 PER LESSON. 1.5 HOUR LESSON.
MINIMUM 4 LESSONS. during the course of a month.
The reason for the 4 lesson minimum is - let's only take serious people. You can't expect to get what you need in an hour-and-a-half and there's going to be some sort of assignment for each session so you can do things on your own. I can if you like combine two lessons into a 3-hour lesson.
First half hour is an evaluation (let's try and figure out what you need).
The concentration is black and white output, but there are so many possible areas: digital capture, film development, inkjet printing techniques, photoshop techniques (uh, that is vague but geared towards the b&w print), useful photoshop plug-ins for b&w, street shooting, urban landscape (composition - bring a tripod), rangefinder shooting technique - in other words, anything that I know something about is fair game.
I'm guessing that every person is going to arrive with different goals and different expertise so I would like, as much as possible to tailor it to the individual.
Note: All of this in my state-of-the-art, fully equiped, smoke-free studio (studio can fit two comfortably). Have I left anything out? Let me know.
BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOGRAPY LESSONS
$100 PER LESSON. 1.5 HOUR LESSON.
MINIMUM 4 LESSONS. during the course of a month.
The reason for the 4 lesson minimum is - let's only take serious people. You can't expect to get what you need in an hour-and-a-half and there's going to be some sort of assignment for each session so you can do things on your own. I can if you like combine two lessons into a 3-hour lesson.
First half hour is an evaluation (let's try and figure out what you need).
The concentration is black and white output, but there are so many possible areas: digital capture, film development, inkjet printing techniques, photoshop techniques (uh, that is vague but geared towards the b&w print), useful photoshop plug-ins for b&w, street shooting, urban landscape (composition - bring a tripod), rangefinder shooting technique - in other words, anything that I know something about is fair game.
I'm guessing that every person is going to arrive with different goals and different expertise so I would like, as much as possible to tailor it to the individual.
Note: All of this in my state-of-the-art, fully equiped, smoke-free studio (studio can fit two comfortably). Have I left anything out? Let me know.
3/04/2006
Academy Relics
" I live in Edinburgh, Scotland (a beautiful city, visit it one day!) and use a mixture of Contax G2 and Pentax 67 for different stuff. It was snowy here yesterday and I was working in the Old Town using the 67, looking for patterns on the roofs of the old buildings. Camera was mounted on tripod when a tourist (American) looked at me in wonder, and asked was I using 'a new type of digital camera', and looked totally bemused when I told him that no, it was film, and black and white too! He kept looking at me as if he'd just seen a relic...! "
It's pretty easy in this country to check whether you're a relic or not. There is a simple test this time of year:
How many of the films nominated for best picture at the Oscars have you seen?
ZERO = relic! Total relic. You're still using glass plates.
ONE = you're not a relic yet, but you will be one next year.
TWO = you're just old. But if you don't get out more you will be a relic all too soon.
THREE = You're no relic. You're swingin' baby. You just got the latest powershot.
FOUR = You just picked up the latest Canon digital SLR and you don't even take pictures.
FIVE = You are the lastest in digital. Not even available yet.
Oh - I've seen zero (total relic). I don't want to see I Walk the Line. I'm not even such a big Johnny Cash fan and that guy who's playing him reminds me of the bad guy from Gladiator.
Truman Capote and cold blood. I'll see it on DVD.
Where's the big blockbuster?
It's pretty easy in this country to check whether you're a relic or not. There is a simple test this time of year:
How many of the films nominated for best picture at the Oscars have you seen?
ZERO = relic! Total relic. You're still using glass plates.
ONE = you're not a relic yet, but you will be one next year.
TWO = you're just old. But if you don't get out more you will be a relic all too soon.
THREE = You're no relic. You're swingin' baby. You just got the latest powershot.
FOUR = You just picked up the latest Canon digital SLR and you don't even take pictures.
FIVE = You are the lastest in digital. Not even available yet.
Oh - I've seen zero (total relic). I don't want to see I Walk the Line. I'm not even such a big Johnny Cash fan and that guy who's playing him reminds me of the bad guy from Gladiator.
Truman Capote and cold blood. I'll see it on DVD.
Where's the big blockbuster?
3/03/2006
3/02/2006
Silver Rag not Yet
In case you're wondering - I still haven't received the museo silver rag paper. My supplier doesn't have it yet but they expect it tomorrow. I have enough left to do one more 11 x 14 print. After that - unless someone specifically asks for the paper - I'll go back to the Epson lustre.
And even with the bronchitis - I ventured out with the Hexar this morning during the snow flurry and that was a good idea because I haven't seen much snow since.
And even with the bronchitis - I ventured out with the Hexar this morning during the snow flurry and that was a good idea because I haven't seen much snow since.
advice
"hi. i just wanted to let you know how much i enjoy you're work. i read that you are using film and i believe that you're pictures are very remarkable. i looked at each one of them in the photography store.
i am in my freshman year at [xyz] college and i really want to study photography but they don't teach anything about film anymore and one of my teachers' mr. meadows who teaches digital photography said that i might contact you. is that okay?
do you think that a newbie is better off with film or digital? i'm not sure. film seems more beautiful to me.
also, could you advise about film and scanner combinations? there's so much to ask. what film camera would you use to start with? what do you think about the cost? is it expensive to develop film? i know this is a lot to ask but i am so impresed with you're work that i think you would be a good person to ask. " - norma
This is a composite of three e-mails from the last three days. But there is some weird confluence going on out there where students are getting interested in film again. Remember how black and white was dead once? Is it possible that there will always be an interest in film? That it will go in and out of fashion with say 10% of professionals? Letters like this make me feel ancient.
i am in my freshman year at [xyz] college and i really want to study photography but they don't teach anything about film anymore and one of my teachers' mr. meadows who teaches digital photography said that i might contact you. is that okay?
do you think that a newbie is better off with film or digital? i'm not sure. film seems more beautiful to me.
also, could you advise about film and scanner combinations? there's so much to ask. what film camera would you use to start with? what do you think about the cost? is it expensive to develop film? i know this is a lot to ask but i am so impresed with you're work that i think you would be a good person to ask. " - norma
This is a composite of three e-mails from the last three days. But there is some weird confluence going on out there where students are getting interested in film again. Remember how black and white was dead once? Is it possible that there will always be an interest in film? That it will go in and out of fashion with say 10% of professionals? Letters like this make me feel ancient.
3/01/2006
Murder Machine
New York Post Headline: MURDER MACHINE CAUGHT
I can only make out the headline, not the date. I can remember creeping up because I could make out the headline (this was shot with a 21mm). Where else but Central Park, New York?
Lester
Lester - this one is for you. Now you can go back and read all your comments in the blog by just clicking here: all of Lester's comments.
As can anyone else with a distinctive name. Go to the advanced search by clicking the search button and then set the category to blog, fill in your own name and you should find a collection or your own writing. Good grief, what won't they think of next.
As can anyone else with a distinctive name. Go to the advanced search by clicking the search button and then set the category to blog, fill in your own name and you should find a collection or your own writing. Good grief, what won't they think of next.
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