All the News

Many years ago, never mind how many - I went to work for a behemoth Public Relations firm in Manhattan. I had been through film school, and was broke. I found a job as a secretary. This was before the secretary became an administrative assistant.

I did typing, got coffee for the big boys and fulfilled other menial tasks for three account execs.

On my first day - a famous author strolled by and went with several execs into the video room. He was going to begin a book tour. The PR firm had a facsimile of a television studio setup and for several hours they interviewed him as if they were the host of a morning show; played back and critiqued him, and finally gave their approval for him to hit the morning show circuit.

This was shocking to me. I was asking my bosses whether this was common to rehearse people for television. They looked at me like I was nuts. Of course it's necessary. We give them talking points to sell their book. We make them appealing - if we can. Some of them are hopeless. And we teach them how to be relaxed.

I did all the typing, and a lot of the preliminary phone calls I had more shocks. It seemed that these execs spent most of their time trying to figure out ways to get their clients in the newspapers. They were constantly seeking some angle that would make their clients newsworthy.

And guess what - a large number of their clients were - yes - politicians.

Great excitement when a piece got in - especially with good placement.

As time went on, I began to notice that about 40% of what I was reading had begun life at a PR firm. I always thought these reporters just went out and figured what a good story was. It wasn't like that at all. Often, they just sat at their desks culling through various story ideas that had been offered by the big PR firms.

Public Relations at this level was very profitable - and I guess still is because:

a) the people who are reading the paper or watching the t.v. take it all as having the imprint of reality since it doesn't appear as a commercial that could be ignored and b) since the public relations effort is generally more effective than an advertisement - and since it is free, i.e. the news organization is happy to use it for no charge - the profit for the PR firm can be enormous.

I had been there for a few weeks when there was this buzz in the office that a big shot was coming in for a big shot conference. Yes - it was a politico in the Reagan administration. I honestly can't remember who it was. But it was very exciting all around - especially amongst the hired help.

Part of my job was to clean up after the conference. The usual corporate breakfast junk. The big shots had left, but there were these little yellow post-its on a tackboard. Bits of scribbling. I glanced at them as I tossed them - but saw the word "environmental" several times.

Sure enough, a few days later on the evening news, there was this same politico announcing a new environmental policy.

I'm not implying that any of this is devious. It's just another form of salesmanship. But it has tainted me.

Anyway, what made me think about all this in the first place was when I saw the new nominee for the Supreme Court standing beside President Bush. It reminded me of these PR sessions where they'd videotape whoever it was and then adjust their movements, their clothes, their smiles until the PR people were happy.

I'm guessing that very soon the nominee will be sitting in front of a mock panel of senators - videotaped - and rehearsed over and over. I'd give a million bucks to see some of those tapes.